


Eudora Explains It All

by ObliqueOptimism



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Gen, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Not Beta Read, Sober Klaus Hargreeves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-27
Updated: 2019-08-27
Packaged: 2020-09-28 02:44:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20418602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ObliqueOptimism/pseuds/ObliqueOptimism
Summary: Eudora and Diego need a little help on a case, thankfully Diego knows someone who can talk to the dead.





	Eudora Explains It All

**Author's Note:**

> listen, i had a few scenes in my head that i wanted to write so this is not focused on the crime part, i can't write murder mysteries so whatever. i don't even know what this is or if its any good but too bad i'm posting it because i like the title.

Eudora grew up on the other side of the country so when she heard about the Umbrella Academy she thought it was a bunch of bullshit. Okay so a kid is strong, he must lift weights; a kid can throw knives, well so can her uncle; a kid can spread rumors, so did half the people she went to school with; a kid can see the dead, but _can he really?_; a kid can teleport, sounds like he just could run really fast; a kid can make tentacles come out of his body and kill people, _but can he?_

And then she grew up, became a cop, and moved across the country. She’d needed a fresh start, and what was more fresh than moving as far away as you could while still staying in the continental US. 

It’d been about ten months since she moved. eight since she partnered with Diego Hargreeves, one of those Umbrella kids. Turned out he _could_ throw knives really well. Way better than her uncle. But he was a good guy, a little odd at times, but that was usually attributed to his superhero upbringing. He clearly didn’t want others holding that against him and Eudora tried not too but sometimes it was obvious (the man carried around multiple knives and reached for those instead of a gun when going into a dangerous situation).

The two of them worked well together. She didn’t know a lot about the Umbrella Academy and never asked about it and didn’t fangirl over him. He respected her and her judgement. Diego was very easy to get along with, that really was all their relationship was built on. Mutual respect. 

There was some obvious tension or bad blood between him and some of the others on the force, some because they didn’t like that a kid superhero became a cop, some because they loved that their childhood idol became a cop just like them. He’d apparently had a few partners before Eudora came along, but based on how they all acted together she wasn’t surprised that none of them stuck.

If you asked her, they were all adults and should act like it. They weren’t at a playground, they were at their jobs. No time for childish whims or childish grudges.

But, as stated, the two of them worked well together. They’d solved most of their cases. Diego’s superhero background did come in handy as he was taught some crime solving tricks that wasn’t covered in the police academy. She had to double check that the new techniques they were trying were still legal, but it worked out very well. 

However, they’d caught a very messy murder about a month ago. There were signs that it could’ve been ritualistic. Any leads they had didn’t pan out. Then another murder happened, same way as before. Still no real leads. 

When the third murder happened, Diego sighed and said he had an idea.

Apparently his brother was an official consultant with the police. Not that they used him very often, but he was known to help them out from time to time. “Now that he’s sober.”

Eudora did not like the sound of this.

They pulled up outside of a doughnut shop. “Why are we here?”

“It’s where Klaus said to meet him,” Diego sighed again. He seemed to do that when he mentioned his brother. That didn’t help Eudora feel comfortable with calling in Diego’s superhero brother. She wasn’t even sure which one he was. Strong? Monster in his belly? Teleportation?

She followed him out of the car and into the diner. It looked like it hadn’t been updated in decades. Some of the booths had duct tape keeping the seats together. An older blonde waitress was behind the counter, she gave a tight smile and waved to them. A middle aged tow truck driver was at the counter and a lone skinny man with untamed hair was smoking in a booth.

Smoking in public places had been illegal for a number of years now.

Of course they sat down next to the smoker and not the truck driver. 

Diego sighed again, “You aren’t supposed to smoke in here.”

Klaus took a deep drag and stared his brother down, “Cigarettes or crack, take your pick.”

“Jesus, Klaus,” Diego gave his brother a tight look.

Eudora also looked at him closer. He seemed -- He seemed tired. His hair was unkempt, eye make-up masking bags under his eyes poorly, mismatched outfit, one hand tapping out a tune as if compulsive, and a white medical bracelet on the one holding the cigarette. 

Diego’s eyes were on the bracelet, “You relapsed? You okay bro?”

“Y’know,” Klaus drawled, “sometimes a boy just needs to take a _fucking nap_.”

Eudora didn’t fully understand what relapsing had to do with naps but Diego gave a tight nod. She recognized it as him trying to not show how much the statement just made hurt him. She saw it a lot when they dealt with abused kids. 

“So, you’re fresh from rehab?” Diego asked. He was probably worried for more than one reason. The main reason Eudora was worried was that Klaus was only a consultant if he was _sober_. “How are things with Dave going?” Dave was? Based on the context Eudora would say Klaus’s boyfriend. 

“Great,” Klaus smirked, taking one last drag of his cigarette before putting it out. “Sometimes I can make him solid and we can kiss and so butt stuff.”

Eudora frowned. She kept quiet though, she knew she should leave Diego to do most of the talking. It was his brother. A glance at her partner confirmed he knew whatever Klaus was talking about.

Diego’s face was knowing and pinched, “That’s too much information.”

Klaus leaned forward, “Like rimjobs and anal.”

“Klaus, _please_,” Diego pleaded.

“That’s what he said last night,” Klaus cackled. 

Diego sighed and dropped his head in his hands. 

“We have a case,” Eudora said, taking control.

“Obviously,” Klaus rolled his eyes.

“We have the case file in the car,” Diego looked up. “If you’ll help. _Can you help?_”

Klaus shoved his wrist in Diego’s face, “Two weeks since relapse. Make outs with Dave. Frottage with Dave. Dave’s beautiful, thick cock in my--”

“Shut up!” Diego yelled. “I get it. You’re sober.”

Klaus winked.

Eudora idly wondered why sexual encounters with Dave meant he was sober. Maybe Dave was very against drugs and would only be with Klaus when he was sober. Eudora figured that meant Dave was supportive of Klaus’s sobriety but not as supportive as he could be. When your loved one relapsed you shouldn’t pull away, they needed more support. But it wasn’t her place to mention this.

Also why was Klaus still wearing the medicale bracelet? 

Eudora didn’t get it, but she also didn’t push it. It wasn’t her place. She didn’t need to learn more about Diego’s family, she just needed the case solved.

“Come with us to the car?” Diego asked.

“_What’s the magic word?_” Klaus sing-songed.

Diego sighed deeper than she’d ever heard, “Fuck you, Klaus.”

“Close enough!” Klaus clapped. He then stood and greeted the waitress who was walking over with a box of doughnuts, “Put it on my tab, Agnes. You’re a peach. Tell Hazel I hate him and he’d better take you to that restaurant I suggest for your anniversary!”

Agnes, the waitress, smiled and hugged him, “Of course, dear. You be safe now.”

“_Never!_” Klaus giggled as he led the way out to Diego’s car.

Klaus did not take the file from Diego. He only lit up another cigarette and said, “Fuck no, Di.”

Diego didn’t suggest Klaus read the file, he just let him smoke in the car as they drove. No comments about the crime or the scene or what was to come. Eudora thought it would be helpful to prepare Klaus. At this point, Eudora was fairly sure that Klaus was the one who saw the dead. 

She felt sorry for him.

That couldn't be easy.

They arrived at the fresh crime scene. It had been less than 24 hours. Blood, flies, _the smell_. Eudora didn’t want to go back in there, if she was honest. It was rough. One of the worst crime scenes she’d seen in her career. 

The ritualistic murders had been full of blood, disfigurement of the boy, runes written in the blood, crystals, symbols. They were messy and dark and Eudora had _never seen anything like it_.

As they showed up at the scene, Eudora soon figured out that Diego wasn’t going to warn his brother and would not to stand to let Klaus go in there without being prepared. She reached out and put a hand on his shoulder.

“As a warning, it’s really gruesome in there.” She kept her hand light, voice smooth and certain.

Klaus gave her a look of pity and smiled sadly at her. _”Oh honey.”_

With that, he walked in.

She expected crying, shock, pleading. What she got was a sigh. A knowing sigh.

She followed him in and Klaus was just standing in the main room, hands on his hips, nodding at nothing.

“Uh-huh. Sure,” Klaus walked into the next room, gesturing for them to follow. Diego didn’t direct Klaus to where the murder had happened but Klaus found it anyway. “I get it, hold on.” He held up a hand to the air beside him and looked around. 

“First off, your killer is stupid. These runes mean fuckall. Uh, wrong crystals too.” He pointed to a crystal, “That one’s fake. So either he’s stupid or he’s trying to throw you off his trail as he kills as he wants. Oh, yeah. You’re right Ben, could be both.”

Diego looked pained at hearing Ben’s name. 

“Fucking, is that a god damn Fabreeze candle. _How gauche._ What a monster.”

“Klaus,” Diego’s voice was tight. 

“Yeah yeah,” Klaus rolled his eyes. Pointing at the air to his left, “You. You see anything? You around for this or did it take a while to show up? Yeah? Okay. No, I get it.” He turned to his other side and hissed, “_Wait your turn._” before turning back to the first patch of air.

He continued to talk to himself. To ghosts. For few minutes. Diego didn’t seemed fazed by it in the least, while Eudora was trying to follow the conversation. 

“Can you let us question them?” Diego asked at a point when it seemed like no ghosts were talking.

Klaus eyed his brother, “Sure you want to do that?”

“I’ve seen the bodies, Klaus,” Diego frowned. “I know what they’re going to look like.”

Eudora wasn’t sure if _she_ wanted to talk to the ghosts. It would be good to hear their side of the story, but the idea of talking to the dead wasn’t something she was having an easy time with thinking about. Klaus talking to the dead, okay, she’d heard since childhood he could do that. But she hadn’t known he could make them real. 

Was Dave a ghost?

Was Klaus dating a ghost?

“Suit yourself,” Klaus shrugged and his hands started to glow blue.

The three victims appeared before them. They were all talking at once. Talking maybe wasn’t the right word. The first one was screaming in pain and anger, not taking a breath. How she could yell like that while her throat had been so badly bashed in, Eudora didn’t know. The second was asking Klaus to pay attention to her. She needed to tell him, he needed to help her, he had to listen, he had to help, help help help listen listen help. The third was the only one who seemed sane. 

Eudora almost threw up.

They looked like their bodies. Cut up, carvings, runes, blood staines, bruises. 

“Right now, I’d question this one first,” Klaus gestured to the latest victim. “Maybe you can get these two to tell you something but,” he shrugged, “good luck with that.”

Eudora was lost for words. Was this what it was like for Klaus? Could he choose not to see ghosts? Did he become an addict because this was what his life was? She watched as Diego took over the questioning. She was too overcome with emotions at seeing the ghosts. Diego was acting like talking to ghosts was old news. Maybe it was for him. 

Then there was a male ghost in front of her. She smiled gently at her, “Want to go sit in the other room?”

Klaus gave her and the ghost a nod, sticking next to Diego who sent her a sorry smile.

She let the ghost take her to the other room.

“I’m Ben, their brother,” Ben introduced himself. 

“God your family--” Eudora rubbed at her temples for a second, trying to stop a headache from forming.

Ben laughed, “Don’t I know it.”

The two of them stayed in the other room while Diego questioned the victims. She should be in there, helping, but it was a bit much. Maybe it was just one ghost she’d do better. Obviously, she was hanging out with Ben. Turned out he was the tentacle stomach brother. But he seemed happy in death. Good for him.

Eventually the screaming from other room stopped and the two living Hargreeves came into the room. Diego looked pale and shaken up. He obviously hadn’t liked talking to the ghosts. Klaus meanwhile cracked a joke to Ben who shook his head fondly. 

“You coming to dinner tonight, Di?” Klaus asked as they exited the crime scene. “Dave wants to make his grandma’s whatever dish. I don’t remember what it’s called. Family recipe. Always makes too much and like, I’m the only one in our apartment who can eat, no offense Ben, and if you come I won’t have to eat it for a solid week like last time.” 

“Why doesn’t he just make less of it?” Diego questioned.

“When I suggested that he acted like it was sacrilege. He was very cute when he ranted to me about it. Wanted to kiss him but if I’d made him solid I think he wouldn’t thrown a shoe at me.” Klaus turned to Eudora, “You can come too. You seem nice. Ben seems to like you. Celebrate the closed case and all.”

“It’s not closed yet,” Diego muttered. 

Klaus waved his hand, “Whatever. You just got so much new info. You’ll make the arrest soon and all that. Anyway, you guys coming tonight?”

Diego seemed ready to turn him down but Eudora was curious. “Sure, we’ll be there.”

“Eudora!”

“Sweet,” Klaus smiled at her. “Alright, well I’m off.” He turned around and started talking away.

“Want a ride?” Diego yelled at his retreating form.

“Sure, but I only ride Dave!” Klaus turned and then thrust his hips at them before cackling and turning the corner.

At some point Ben disappeared, leaving Euorda standing alone with Diego.

“Tonight should be fun,” Eudora smirked. 

Diego sighed. He seemed to do that a lot when it came to Klaus. She could see why now. 

So maybe she’d been wrong as a kid and the Umbrella Academy did have magic powers. If she had known as a kid that not only she’d believe but befriend them she wouldn’t have trusted a single thing you said. But she was glad that it was happening, it did make life interesting. She idly wondered if they should bring a desert. Obviously bringing wine was out of the question, so maybe a chocolate cake would work. 

Turned out chocolate cake would work. Turned out Dave was a ghost. Turned out they’d be welcome to eat with them whenever because Dave liked to cook and Klaus was the only living person in their apartment and could only eat so much. Turned out Eudora really enjoyed Dave and Ben’s company. Turned out she and Klaus would soon become best friends, much to Diego's chagrin. 

Eudora was happy with how it all turned out.

**Author's Note:**

> find me on tumblr obliquetoptimism.tumblr.com


End file.
